Three weeks ago I was living a relatively blissful existence. Of course I know it wasn’t entirely blissful…life rarely is. But looking back from where I sit now, it sure feels that way!
I was happy, satisfied and carefree. We were getting ready to celebrate the year’s close and heading into 2015 with so much to be thankful for. Mostly, I was looking forward to relaunching my teaching career after years spent nurturing our young children, but travel was high on the agenda too. My husband and I had discussed taking our kids to China in April, which, being a Chinese teacher, was something I was thrilled about!
Three weeks ago I was totally oblivious of what lay just around the corner. Isn’t that always the cue for some sort of bombshell?
Well my bombshell came in the shape of a small, innocuous lump, found in my right armpit one morning, whilst showering. A lump that would rock my little world within hours of its discovery.
I’m almost a month down the line from finding that lump, and two weeks into recovering from major breast surgery (bilateral mastectomy). How quickly life can change! From where I’m perched now, boobless and sore, all I see is the scary treatment journey that awaits me: first chemo, followed by radiotherapy, more chemo & years of hormone therapy with the very real possibility of further surgery to take away my ovaries.
I am grieving for that girl so unaware, and for that beautiful, happy place I was in. I want it all back! I’m terrified that I’ll never be that girl again. And truth be told, how could I ever go back to the old me? Beautiful friends and fellow breast cancer patients have spoken about becoming wiser and more appreciative because of their ordeal. I hope so. And I suppose hope is all I’ve got at the moment.
So for now, many plans for 2015 are on hold for another time. I am taking each new challenge one step at a time, taking the bad days with the good and seeking solace in the knowledge that many, many women have fought this disease before me.
This blog was born out of my love of writing, and the need to express my feelings in a way that is cathartic for me and possibly helpful for others. Already I have gathered up as much info as I can find on breast cancer, but the best stuff by far has been the words written by the women themselves.
So this will be a no holes barred account of my own personal journey through breast cancer and beyond! Please, join my fight!
Cancer Cans 
Thanks for sharing Kate. Keep looking forward. Ill be thinking of you, and sending good vibes your way. Xo
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Thanks so much, Jenny. I really feel so grateful for all the support. It makes everything a little easier.
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Sorry for the shock, it sucks but may you find the many ways to live well with or despite cancer!
Marcy Westerling
http://livinglydying.com/
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Hi Marcy,
Thank you for your empathy and your lovely message. It’s going to be a tough road but I’m buoyed by everyone’s thoughts and support.
Kate
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So sorry to read of your unplanned journey. It’s a small world, I went to school with you and your sister and was in your sisters year and went to primary school with Jason!! (A few years below him!) Best wishes to you for your journey ahead, I wish you much strength and courage. Make sure you lean on those that love you the most, they will help get you though. Will follow your journey with much hope and encouragement. Mardi
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Hi Mardi,
I do remember you at school! Thanks for touching base and for your lovely message. I really appreciate it. How funny that you went to school with Jay too!
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Hi Kate,
I was devastated to hear your news, but you are a strong, intelligent woman with a supportive and loving husband by your side all of the way. Not to mention those 3 adorable little poppets. You will beat this and come out the other side with a wisdom and appreciation of life known only to those who have made similar journeys. Take one day at a time and when it gets rough – remember that this day will pass and it will bring you one day closer to things getting easier. Take care lovely lady – you are in my heart and my prayers.
Lots of love and positive thoughts from Jenny Cross
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Thanks Jenny. I really appreciate your lovely thoughts. X
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Hi Kate, sorry that you are having to go through such a terrible thing. Sending you every ounce of strength and every get well soon wish in the world. Will keep reading and willing you a speedy recovery. Take good care, Radha
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Hi Radha, thanks for sending through your support. It means a lot!
Kate
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